Tuesday, October 16, 2018

The O'Sheas: The Bond of Brotherhood

by Pam Hillman

You’ve probably heard the saying “He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother.”

It goes back to the late 1800s. The story goes that a young Scottish girl was carrying her little brother who was almost as big as she was, and someone commented about how heavy he must be. Sounding somewhat surprised (and quite protective), she replied with a phrase similar to the iconic one we’re so familiar with today.

Ballads have been written, works of art painted, and photos taken of youngsters bravely toting even smaller youngsters on their backs, soldiers carrying their comrades out of battle, and even animations of animals with similar themes. Statues have been erected, orphanages formed with the saying adopted as the catch phrase for caring for—and carrying—each other.

Siblings. Brothers. Sisters.

There’s a special bond between siblings that transcends any other bond on earth. Siblings are the only people who know each other from birth until death and all the stages in between. Granted, being siblings doesn’t mean being alike in personality, having the same goals in life, or even expressing faith in our Lord and Savior. The truth is, siblings might not see eye-to-eye on a lot of things. But the bond is still there, and in healthy relationships, that bond is hard to break.

But sometimes misunderstandings, outside influences, mental illnesses, or tragedy can cause that bond to become frayed or even broken.

Such is the case for the O’Shea brothers in the 18th century in the Natchez, Mississippi district. The eldest brother, Connor O’Shea, was forced to leave Ireland years ago when he became romantically involved with a woman of the upper class. Quinn O’Shea, the hero in The Road to Magnolia Glen, arrives in Natchez harboring feelings of resentment that his older brother had abandoned the family when they needed him most. And, then there’s the third brother, Caleb, who left for parts unknown some years ago and hasn’t been seen since. Throw in deceased parents and two younger brothers, and all of this makes for some serious grudges between the three oldest brothers.

I have two sons of my own, and while they’ve never had to deal with the tragedy of losing a parent, being torn from their homeland or separated from their siblings, they were your normal rowdy, rough and tough boys. Sometimes I despaired that they’d ever get along.

You moms know what I mean. You’re in the kitchen preparing dinner after a long day and hear a ruckus that raises the roof. It might be the fight over the remote. Or whose turn it is to choose the next video game, or whose job it is to take out the trash this week. It could be anything or nothing, but it was always huge at the moment. This stage seemed to last about 15 years or so with my boys.

But sprinkled throughout those 15 years were times I heard (mostly second-hand) of my oldest coming to the defense of the younger when someone else mistreated him in some way. There’s nothing like having a big brother on the bus when other kids start picking on you, is there?

There’s another saying about siblings. Variations abound, but the gist of it is, “You mess with my brother, you mess with me.”

It’s one thing for brothers and sisters to argue and fight with each other, but if someone else attempts to do the same, their own squabbles are forgotten and they band together to stand against the “enemy”.

I grew up with two older brothers, and as the “baby girl” in the family, I knew they’d come to my rescue. It’s funny, I can’t think of a single time when I really needed either of them to save me. There were no bullies, no crazy accidents, and no late night clandestine shenanigans. But somehow I knew that if I needed either of them, all I had to do was ask. Decades later, nothing has changed.

The O’Shea brothers in my Natchez Trace Novel series can square off, glare and growl at each, circle like half-mad tigers in a cage, and even consider throwing a punch or two, but you know what?

When all is said and done, their true allegiance comes out when someone else threatens one of them. Past hurts aren’t always easily forgiven or forgotten, but when push comes to shove, the O’Shea brothers still stand shoulder-to-shoulder against the world.

And that’s as it should be.

He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother.

CBA Bestselling author PAM HILLMAN was born and raised on a dairy farm in Mississippi and spent her teenage years perched on the seat of a tractor raking hay. In those days, her daddy couldn't afford two cab tractors with air conditioning and a radio, so Pam drove an Allis Chalmers 110. Even when her daddy asked her if she wanted to bale hay, she told him she didn't mind raking. Raking hay doesn't take much thought so Pam spent her time working on her tan and making up stories in her head. Now, that's the kind of life every girl should dream of. www.pamhillman.com


  1. How interesting to find out where that phrase comes from. I appreciated your post!

  2. Beautiful post and a great reminder about caring for others because "he ain't heavy, he's my brother. A beautiful picture of God carrying our sins to Calvary.