Wedding Traditions: New and Old

   __By Tiffany Amber Stockton__

In April, the historic total solar eclipse of April 8th received the spotlight focus. As we head into the popular months for weddings, let's look at some traditions and how they got started.

WEDDING TRADITION ORIGINS: PART ONE

Some things about weddings seem to remain unchanged — the bride wears white, the couple is apart on the day of the ceremony, and a cake must be made. But how did those traditions become actual traditions?

Not seeing your spouse-to-be until the ceremony starts now exists as a romanticized tradition, but at one time, it ensured that marrying off a daughter actually happened. Despite all the romantic movies and books out there highlighting marriage to the one you love, that's a relatively new concept. 

Prior to the 18th century, marriage was used to improve a family’s social standing in some way. Brides and grooms often got paired off without giving much of their own input. As a result, arranged marriages had a high risk for cold feet. Keeping the couple apart until they said their vows reduced the chances that one of them would back out before making it to the altar.

This next one made me chuckle. It can definitely be chalked up to superstition. The English rhyme of “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a silver sixpence in her shoe,” was first heard in the mid-19th century. It didn't appear in print until 1871.

More than these items bringing mere luck on the wedding day, the "something borrowed" item was supposed to increase the bride's chance of becoming pregnant. So, the bride borrowed a pair of bloomers from a woman who had already become a mother. Can you believe that? I don't know about you, but I don't know that I could have donned another woman's underwear beneath my gown.

"Something old" represents the bride's past. "Something new" symbolizes the couple's happy future. "Something borrowed" comes from someone happily married in the hope good fortune rubs off on her. "Something blue" denotes fidelity and love.

Speaking of dresses, a white gown has only been commonplace for about 150 years. Historically, brides simply repurposed their best dress as their wedding gown. Prior to modern washing machines and stain removers, white clothing was rare because it was so difficult to keep clean. Brown, gray, and even red were the more popular colors.

Queen Victoria (after whom my daughter is named) wore a lacy white gown at her 1840 wedding, and she's often credited with making "bridal white" popular. However, she wasn't the first. Mary, Queen of Scots wore white during her 1558 Notre Dame wedding, and several other royals wore white before Queen Victoria.

Nevertheless, just a few years after Victoria’s wedding, dressmakers and etiquette books latched onto white as being virginal and pure. Godey’s Lady’s Book even wrote that a white dress was “an emblem of the innocence and purity of girlhood, and the unsullied heart which she now yields to the keeping of the chosen one.” Wow. That's quite a mouthful. :)

There are many other traditions, such as the reason for a bridal party, the exchange of wedding rings, tossing rice, and even saving a tier of the wedding cake, but I'll save those for next month.

NOW IT'S YOUR TURN:

* What traditions did *you* follow for your wedding? If you haven't had one yet, what traditions do you intend to follow?

* How would you respond if an arranged marriage was still the leading method today? Do you feel they have any merit? If so, in what situations or circumstances?

* Marriage is a consecrated union, set forth by God, and designed to be a temporal representation of the eternal agape love of Christ for His Church. What are your thoughts on how to help restore the sanctity of marriage in today's society?

** This note is for our email readers. Please do not reply via email with any comments. View the blog online and scroll down to the comments section.

Come back on the 9th of each month for my next foray into historical tidbits to share.

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BIO

Tiffany Amber Stockton has been crafting and embellishing stories since childhood, when she was accused of having a very active imagination and cited with talking entirely too much. Today, she has honed those skills to become an award-winning, best-selling author and speaker who is also a professional copywriter/copyeditor. She loves to share life-changing products and ideas with others to help improve their lives in a variety of ways.

She lives with her husband and fellow author, Stuart Vaughn Stockton, along with their two children, one dog, and three cats in southeastern Kentucky. In the 20+ years she's been a professional writer, she has sold twenty-six (26) books so far and is represented by Tamela Murray of the Steve Laube Agency. You can find her on Facebook and GoodReads.

Happy Birthday to Eight Eminent Women

 

Happy 481^st Birthday to Mary, Queen of Scots

Queen of Scotland (1542-1567)

Born: December 8, 1542

Birthplace: Linlithgow Palace, Linlithgow, Scotland

Died: February 8, 1587 (44 years old)

 

Queen Elizabeth I of England, the daughter of King Henry VIII and Anne Boleyn, imprisoned Mary, Henry’s great-niece, and eventually had her beheaded for treason. 

 

“In the end is my beginning.”

 

Happy 193^rd Birthday to Emily Dickinson

Reclusive American poet

 

Born: December 10, 1830

Birthplace: Amherst, Massachusetts, United States

Died: May 15, 1886 (55 years old)

 

Miss Dickinson, known for dressing in white, wrote approximately 1800 poems that “were mostly without titles and had short lines, slant rhyme, and unconventional punctuation” (TFP#94). 

Most of her work was published after her death.

 

Happy 208^th Birthday to Ada Lovelace, Countess of Lovelace

Mathematician and “Earliest Computer Programmer” (Lovelace)

Birthdate: December 10, 1815

Birthplace: London

Died: November 27, 1852 (36 years old)

Ada, the daughter of the poet Lord Byron (author of Don Juan), worked on Charles Babbage’s proposed “analytical engine,” a mechanical general-purpose computer proposed by Charles Babbage. Many believe “she published the first algorithm after realizing that the algorithm could be carried out by a machine like the Analytical Engine” (TFP#66).

 

"I am much pleased to find how very well I stand work and 

how my powers of attention and continued effort increase." 

 

Happy 205^th Birthday to Mary Todd Lincoln

First Lady of the United States (1861 - 1865); President Abraham Lincoln’s wife

 

Born: December 13, 1818

Birthplace: Lexington, Kentucky, United States

Died: July 16, 1882 (63 years old)

 

Mrs. Lincoln’s intelligence and dedication to her husband are often overshadowed by her reputation as a frivolous spendthrift. After the assassination, she suffered from severe depression, financial problems, and legal disputes. 

 

“My evil genius Procrastination has whispered me 

to tarry ‘til a more convenient season.”

 

Happy 121^st Birthday to Frances Bavier

Actress best known for playing Aunt Bee on The Andy Griffith Show.

 

Born: December 14, 1902

Birthplace: Manhattan, New York City, New York

Died: December 6, 1989 (almost 87 years old)

 

Ms. Bavier's career began in the theater, but it was her portrayal of Aunt Bee that made her famous and beloved by generations of fans. She earned critical acclaim for the role and was nominated for two Emmy nominations for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series.

 

“…Aunt Bee is so much nicer than the real me.”

 

Happy 538^th Birthday to Catherine of Aragon

Queen Consort of England (1509 - 1533)

 

Birthdate: December 16, 1485

Birthplace: Alcala de Henares, Spain

Died: January 7, 1536 (50 years old)

 

The daughter of Spain’s monarchs, Isabella I of Castile and Ferdinand II of Aragon, and mother of Queen Mary I gained her fame as the first wife of the infamous King Henry VIII. She refused to give in to her husband’s demands for an annulment which had far-reaching religious implications. She “commissioned The Education of a Christian Woman, a controversial book promoting women’s right to education” (TFP#137).

 

“I choose what I believe and say nothing. 

For I am not as simple as I may seem.”

 

Happy 248^th Birthday to Jane Austen

English author of Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, Persuasion (my favorite), and other novels.

 

Birthdate: December 16, 1775

Birthplace: Steventon, Hampshire, England, United Kingdom

Died: July 18, 1817 (41 years old)

 

Miss Austen’s novels may be seen by some as lighthearted stories. On a deeper level, however, she is celebrated for her sharp wit, keen sense of irony, and insightful observations on human nature. Each novel has been adapted for film and television numerous times, and today she is recognized as a pioneer of the modern novel.

 

“The person, be it lady or gentleman, who has not pleasure in a good novel, 

must be intolerably stupid.”

 

Happy 107^th Birthday to Betty Grable 

American actress known for Mother Wore Tights and How to Marry a Millionaire

 

Birthdate: December 18, 1916

Birthplace: St. Louis, Missouri, United States

Died: July 2, 1973 (56 years old)

 

The multi-talented Miss Grable could do it all! Actress, dancer, singer…and the pin-up girl with the famous million-dollar legs. She became a cultural icon during World War II as a symbol of hope and optimism for American soldiers who were fighting overseas. Her legacy lives on as a Hollywood legend.

“There are two reasons why I am successful in show business 

and I am standing on both of them.”

 

Your Turn ~ Today we're celebrating the birthdays of royalty, actresses, literary icons, and a science pioneer. Given the opportunity, which one of these notable women's parties would you most like to attend? Let me know in the comments!

My Latest Short Story!

"Christmas Comes to Springlight," a story about two feuding sisters, a tragical tragedy, a repentant thief, and a present from the past, appears in A Thrill in the Air.

The latest Mosaic Collection Christmas Anthology includes eight wonderful stories about reconciliation during the holidays.Available now on Amazon.

 

Johnnie writes award-winning stories in multiple genres. A fan of classic movies, stacks of books, and road trips, she shares a life of quiet adventure with Griff, her happy-go-lucky collie, and Rugby, her raccoon-treeing papillon. Visit her at johnnie-alexander.com.

Photos ~ each photo is in the public domain; modified with Canva.

Ada Lovelace ~ Portrait of Ada by British painter, Margaret Sarah Carpenter (1836), Government Art Collection. 

Betty Grable ~ Publicity photo of Betty Grable. “This work is in the public domain in the United States because it was published in the United States between 1928 and 1977, inclusive, without a copyright notice” (GrablePhoto). Created circa 1950s. 

Catherine of Aragon ~ “This is the largest miniature of Henry VIII's first wife. Three other miniatures exist, but two are circular copies of this original; the third is believed to be a companion piece to a miniature of the king. A unique feature of this work is that it includes Katharine's hands. All of Horenbout's other miniatures focused on the head and shoulders. All of his portraits have plain blue backgrounds and are traced with a gold line. Later artists such as Nicholas Hilliard inherited this style and continued it into the 17th century” (CatherinePhoto).

Emily Dickinson ~ Daguerreotype taken at Mount Holyoke, December 1846 or early 1847; the only authenticated portrait of Dickinson after early childhood. It is presently located in Amherst College Archives & Special Collections. 

Frances Bavier ~ CBS-photographer-Gabor Rona; eBay item photo. Created: 31 May 1964. 

Jane Austen ~ “From a watercolour by James Andrews of Maidenhead based on an unfinished work by Cassandra Austen. Engraving by William Home Lizars. A Memoir of Jane Austen by her nephew J. E. Austen-Leigh, Vicar of Bray, Berks. London: Richard Bentley, New Burlington Street, Publisher in Ordinary to her Majesty, 1870….Portrait of Jane Austen, from the memoir by J. E. Austen-Leigh (1798-1874). All other portraits of Austen are generally based on this, which is itself based on a sketch by Cassandra Austen” (AustenPhoto).

Mary, Queen of Scots ~ Mary in captivity, by Nicholas Hilliard, c. 1578.

Mary Todd Lincoln ~ Brady-Handy Photograph Collection (Library of Congress). 

Sources ~ all websites accessed on December 5, 2023.

Lovelace ~ https://www.thefamouspeople.com/profiles/ada-lovelace-6234.php

 

The following three entries are from this website:

https://www.thefamouspeople.com/famous-people-born-in-december.php

 

TFP#66 ~ Ada Lovelace is the 66^th entry.

TFP#94 ~ Emily Dickinson is the 94^th entry.

TFP#137 ~ Catherine of Aragon is the 137^th entry.

The Art of Letterlocking

 By Nancy J. Farrier

Mailing letters is almost a lost form of communication since we rely more on email or texting. But when we do mail a letter, we use an envelope that closes with a sticky seal. Those envelopes are a fairly new development. The first sealable, prefolded envelope was patented in 1845. What did people do to protect their private words before they had access to these envelopes?

 

Photograph by Rama
Wikimedia Commons

The first type of envelopes discovered were nothing like our modern version. In 3500 to 3200 B.C. a clay tablet was formed with a pocket for protecting what was inside. Usually this would be a token of some sort but perhaps also a message. They were used in private transactions.

 

The Chinese were the first to use paper envelopes. In the 2^nd century B.C., during the Song Dynasty, the imperial court gave monetary gift in paper envelopes to officials. These envelopes were known as Chih poh. They were not used by the common people from what I’ve found.

Photo by Jldbb
Wikimedia Commons

How did people keep their letters from being read and ensure they were private correspondence? There was the option of using sealing wax and a personalized stamp to show that you sent the letter. However, most people didn’t have access to anything so fancy. Instead, they used letterlocking.

 

One of the famous letters known to use this method was sent by Mary Queen of Scots the night before her execution. She wrote to her brother-in-law that, “…I am to be executed like a criminal at eight in the morning.” She further penned words about how her faith brought on her penalty. 

 

Photo by Deutsches Buch-und Schriftmuseum
Wikimedia Commons - 1603 Letter

Then came the dilemma. There was no reliable post in 1587. Instead, Mary folded the letter in intricate folds and cut a thin strip from the bottom of the page. She used a knife to poke a hole through her letter and inserted the strip. Then she looped it through a few times and tightened it to make a spiral lock which didn’t need sealing wax. The only way to open the letter was to break that strip of paper. Thus, when her brother-in-law received the letter, he would know if it had been read.

 

Letterlocking was available to anyone and widely used. Researchers wanted to know more about this way of protecting the written word but many letters had been read and had not lasted through the centuries. 

 

Piggy Bank with the 
Brienne collection.

Then the Brienne collection was discovered and enlightened those researchers on the process. The Brienne collection came from Simon Brienne and his wife, Marie Germain, postmaster and mistress in the Netherlands in the 1600’s. Back then, you had to pay to receive your mail. The sender didn’t buy a stamp but sent the letter and hoped the recipient would have the funds to purchase the missive. Many did not have those funds. 

 

Those letters were marked niet hebben which meant refused. They were kept in a trunk in the hope that the recipient would find the money to pay for the letter and redeem their mail. The trunk was referred to as the piggy bank.

 

The Brienne trunk of unopened letters was passed down through family until it was discovered a few years ago. There were 2,600 letters in the piggy bank and 577 of them had never been opened. These letters were a treasure trove of life in the 1600’s. They represented correspondence from ambassadors, actors, musicians, refugees, and more. They also gave the researchers a look at how letterlocking was done.

Letterlock unfolded

Using modern technology, they were able to look at the letter and how it was folded without undoing the “lock.” They could see the intricate folds, including the varied ways of folding. They categorized twelve different methods of locking a letter to keep it safe until it reached its intended recipient. Some methods were fairly simple and some were very complex.

Twelve ways to lock a letter.

 

I was fascinated by this idea. I knew about sealing wax and stamps used to ensure they weren’t read but had never heard of letterlocking. Have you heard of this method? If you would like to see a sample of how to do a simple letterlock, watch this video.

Nancy J Farrier is an award-winning, best-selling author who lives in Southern Arizona in the Sonoran Desert. She loves the Southwest with its interesting historical past. When Nancy isn’t writing, she loves to read, do needlecraft, play with her cats and dog, and spend time with her family. You can read more about Nancy and her books on her website: nancyjfarrier.com.